Growing up is hard to do

Sometimes growing up means growing apart.

I first met LBart the weekend I moved into Van Meter at UMass Amherst. She roomed across the hall from my high school pal ( the only person I knew at UMass) Being the sarcastic person I am, I pointed out the hickey on her neck,(from the previous nights festivities) before I formerly introduced myself. We had an instant connection. Going from French class to the DC for lunch and then back up the hill we were constantly together. We both had roommates that we didn’t get along with (to say the least), so we spent the majority of our time together. I rowed crew and had a long distance boyfriend, which meant that my hours where a little different then the average college freshman. Yet she was always there for me. Through my first time college experiences, my breakups, our hookups with random boys, my drunken nights, my family issues…she was always my rock. I have never had a connection like this with anyone.

Our roommates ended up moving out second semester so we each had double singles and spent all our spare time in each others rooms. For the rest of our college years we were roommates. When we finally moved off campus we stayed in Amherst for the summer and had way too much fun. Although she was an English major who loved to read book after book after book and I was an Ex Sci Major who could never get enough of my workouts, we just jived perfectly. I stayed at UMass for an extra semester and LBart would always come up and visit, I don’t know whether it was for the food or for me ;) but I loved it. After I finished college I moved in with LBart’s family in Norwood and they took me in as their own when I needed it the most.

I started working at a gym in the city and her father made sure I knew my way around and LBart would come to visit me at work. After saving some money we both moved to Southie, living only 3 streets away from each other. LBart has always been the party planner; the one who keeps us all together, the gorilla glue that holds us crazy UMass Ladies together. She is always down for anything and everything.

Well, last night was LBart’s going away party and today she left for Los Angeles. Don’t get me wrong, I am so happy for her. She needs to take this step in her life, a new start on the West Coast which is amazing for her. To be honest I’ve had a pit in my stomach for the last week, because I realized that she will no longer be a walk away. I said goodbye last night went home and bawled for hours. All the times we shared and everything we went through together. I guess I never thought I would have to say goodbye like this.

I feel guilty that we aren’t as close as we once were; I have been pursuing my career and moving in a different direction for the past few years. I am in a long term relationship and trying to figure out who I am. I guess that this is just how life happens, and people grow up but I love you Laura and I always will.